Friday, September 28, 2012

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Thursday, September 27, 2012

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"One day I’ll unlearn all this,
like I did with the Spanish language,
how to conjugate and certain math equations.
Like the geography of other countries I once thought
I might explore,
and bits and pieces of how the scientific formula goes.
Like the history we’re bound to repeat
regardless of how well our skin knows it or not,
and how to spike a volleyball correctly over the net.
I will unlearn all of you,
the same way I did of these,
the longer I go without the conversations
between your hands and mine,
measuring the angles of your curves I often found
myself sinking easily into,
and planting kisses like flags on parts of you
I wanted to claim.
The longer I go without the chemical reaction
of your feet atop mine on a cold, cold night,
or the physical exertion of constantly making
a permanent amount of wrinkles in the sheets,
and knowing you like to wake up with the comfort of
my arm over your arm
over my stomach —
I will unlearn it all;
although not all at once, and not very soon,
but when I do, I will try to remember
I loved you like a subject I used to know very well,
but have no need to hold onto
anymore."

52hearts

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

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I took my PSY486 test at 8.30am with only 1.5h of sleep. It was a really difficult test. I don't know why I'm not a least bit worried, in fact I'm looking forward to getting it back because I wanna know how badly I've done. I went back home to sleep and gave UGC a miss because I woke up at 5pm haha whoops.

My days are terribly mundane. I can't stand stagnancy. I need to get myself involved in something exciting, instead of just going through the motions everyday. :(

Monday, September 24, 2012

>:(

Before I sleep, say hi to my new phone cover! So pretty I love it! ^__^ IMG_2567 IMG_2524IMG_2556

I ate so much junk food over the weekend it's crazy. I don't know if I was trying to compensate for my sudden loss of interest in school food or if I was just feeding my feelings. I guess it's not that bad knowing that I have been running quite frequently these days. When you tell people that you have been running, most of them (esp girls) naturally think that you're trying to lose weight. And I find it extremely annoying when they go, "Huh so skinny still run!" It's like they don't want you to look "better" than them... Come on??? -___-

1. I am not skinny, but neither do I think I am fat. I think I look healthy enough and it is completely not my aim to be skinny.
2. I don't run to be skinny. I don't run with the sole purpose of losing weight. Some people exercise because they want to look good. And looking good does not necessarily mean being stick thin. What kind of twisted thinking is that. I exercise so I look sexy as fuck naked I can eat whatever I want without having to enter the door sideways some day.
3. Really, I will do anything to procrastinate my work without feeling like I'm wasting my time. And running is the only option I have.

Another thing that annoys me is how girls like to complain about how "fat" they are when they actually aren't. Unless you have BDD, please stop it.

I sound like an angry bitch. Ok goodnight.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Lazy Thursday: I wore my jogger shorts to school.

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My new bb cream! I can never tell the good/bad apart. I love the tiny pigment capsules that burst as you apply the cream on your skin. It's kinda different from the usual asian bb cream though, and I don't think it has any SPF. Wellll what can I say? Novelty is always attractive.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Naked

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I'm turning 21. This is the phase in my life that I should be immersing myself in anything possible. Explore. Get myself into shit. Then step out and get over it. Explore again. Be reckless. Laugh. Nothing should be taken too seriously anyway. I should be making my youth count, and I should never touch the ground. Most importantly I should be happy, except I'm not. At least not recently, at least not today, at least not now. I'm too busy trying to cope with my inadequacies, my inferior complex, my fears, and my crippling need for sincere reassurances.

Milan Kundera once said we all need someone to look at us, and we can be divided into 4 categories according to the kind of look we wish to live under. I am in category 3.

I don't know how to be a better person. I don't know how to walk around with a glow on my face, exuding confidence. I dont know how to ever be sure of myself and to ever be convinced that I am actually good enough. It seems like I can't measure up, and there's nothing I can do to ever compensate for whatever it is I'm lacking.

But I swear the day I learn to fly I'm never coming down.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

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When will I ever stop feeling inadequate? I'm not merely a victim of my own mind.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Deux

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It feels so much longer than just 2 months because of everything we have been through... We could have had it easier, but I don't think that would make our relationship what it is today. This journey hasn't been the smoothest, but that's alright, because nothing worth having ever comes easy. And you're worth all of it.

Happy 2nd month baby ♥

I love you so much. (even though you look like this when you sleep) (I'm not sorry for posting this picture)

Monday, September 17, 2012

Insanity Workout Day 1...

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Ok I was kidding. That was just any normal 1 hour session. Anyway I have been thinking about that for quite some time. I never got down to buying it because I want a partner. And nobody wants to do it with me. :( Wouldn't it be so fun to challenge yourself and have something to look forward to every single day for 60 days?!


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That's my favourite cheeky face ^__^

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He was digging his nose. -..- So the pictures go like this:
1. The position he changed to right after he figured I was gonna take a screen shot.
2. The I-recovered-fast-enough-ha-ha-you-didn't-catch-me face.
3. But I did.

Hehe love you :*

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Double Trouble

Photo on 14-9-12 at 10.56 AM #3 Photo on 14-9-12 at 6.09 PM #4 Photo on 14-9-12 at 6.07 PM #2 Photo on 14-9-12 at 10.58 AM #3 Photo on 14-9-12 at 6.04 PM

1. I want to push the previous post down because I feel scared scrolling through it at night.

2. My favourite pair of denim shorts and I wear it so often it's crazy.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Last Saturday

Last Saturday, Suria, Narm , Nat and I took part in the Resident Evil race - not as contestants, but as zombies. We were supposed to be there to "distract" the contestants.

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:( because we were told to wear jeans. It was so warm?

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Haaaaaaaaahahahahahaha we looked totally ridiculous. -___-

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Nat was about to laugh.

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So basically every zombie was trying to scare the participants right OUTSIDE ION as they ran past but Nat and I were too embarrassed to do it in broad daylight hahaha I was worse because all I did was stand there. Sometimes I felt bad for being a stationary zombie so I tried to walk around a bit hahaha. It lasted for 2-3 hours and although I contributed nothing, I was REALLY tired. Lousy...

Dinner @TCC, alcohol @Zouk bridge after. With my eyeliner-free face.

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Nat wasn't drunk. She was just trying to hide her face from the camera haha.

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The Bacardi apple that we bought but did not even open, because we finished a Martell.

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Lovely night drinking and laughing by the river. I love them to bits.