Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The difference between you and me

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You breathed the air of The City That Never Sleeps,
walked under big lights
in the concrete jungle where dreams are made.
You stood at The Crossroads of the World,
and I wonder if you know
it can't shine as bright as you
(I swear it's true).
And I've stood at the bottom of the London Eye, I've been
to River Thames, watched it run under the Tower Bridge:
a bridge so beautiful and majestic,
like the one in my head that my imagination builds
between two very different countries
of what I want and what I get
- except it can't hold weight.

If I had the chance I would stand at the top
of the Eiffel Tower, and perhaps find myself
falling in love with the City of Light,
but it wouldn't change the fact

that my favorite place will always be somewhere
on the geography of your anatomy, like the space
between your neck and your shoulders,

where my head fits perfectly.

but you are always too intense
frightening in the way you want him
unashamed and sacrificial
he tells you that no man can live up to the one who
lives in your head
and you tried to change didn't you?
closed your mouth more
tried to be softer
less volatile, less awake
but even when sleeping you could feel
him travelling away from you in his dreams
so what did you want to do love
split his head open?
you can't make homes out of human beings
someone should have already told you that
and if he wants to leave
then let him leave
you are terrifying
and strange and beautiful
something not everyone knows how to love.

― Warsan Shire

Would you realise how lucky you are,
if you found the kind of relationship
some people wait their whole lives for?

Monday, November 26, 2012

Cyber Monday @ Nasty Gal

Okkkk I'm doing it again. Currently facing a great financial crisis. The poorer I am, the more I like to look at clothes. What is wrong with me.

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Looking at sparkly things makes me very happy.

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Anyway I have always preferred spring/summer collection. Autumn/winter is always so dull, except for the occasional shimmery and sparkly things.

I would totally live in heels if I could. But my lifestyle does not support it. I walk a lot.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

"Angry, and half in love with [you], and tremendously sorry, I turned away."
― F. Scott Fitzgerald


The pullover smells of you. The letter smells of you the most, because you like to spray them with your scent. Do not underestimate the power of a scent. It brings you back in time. It brings you back to a place. It evokes an emotion that you thought you had so instinctively chosen to forget, so adamantly refused to remember. Turns out it was always there, at a dusty corner of your conflicted soul.

This dissonance... I can't come to a consensus. Heart and mind, like the North and Baltic seas. Where I am is where both seas meet - they can't merge because they have different densities.

I can't set myself up for disappointment again.

Too late


Friday, November 23, 2012

Nasty Gal

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My favorite web store Nasty Gal is having a sale, and I'm going crazy looking at all the stuff that I have always wanted. The price of the first pair of pink/brown velcro heels is reduced by more than half, for example. I am so broke I regret not saving up for Black Friday. I feel like crying. It sounds so stupid but I truly feel like crying :'( I mean please just look at them. I don't even know why I bothered to pick them out because I would wear anything from Nasty Gal. Anything. Almost.

On the bright side, my package from ASOS came today. What a pleasant surprise. It usually takes 2 weeks so I was expecting it to arrive only next week. My item fits me perfectly. :)

Still sad over Nasty Gal. Sigh.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012



Me showing off my ~*sparkly*~ clutch because I love it.





Obviously very happy with my clutch again hahaha.

I look like I just showered... perspired like mad from all the dancing with the crowd.

My all-time favorite: mozzarella sticks!!

1. I am still very amazed at how I always manage to remove my make up and then pick fresh clothes to change into when I reach home from the club. I do make the effort to shower sometimes but mostly I am obviously too inebriated to do that. EWW LA EW I know! I mean I don't even vividly remember anything I did before crashing into bed.

2. I always hate the day after clubbing. I eat like crazy. My stomach becomes a bottomless pit. And my brain fails to comprehend the meaning of stop.

3. I am so damn broke right now it's not even funny.

4. French oral went pretty well I believe! One thing off my chest yay!

5. I cannot wait for Zoukout!!!!